Spanking May Not Be The Most Effective Way To Discipline Your Child

Anytime I read comments on the articles about why you shouldn’t spank your child, it’s obvious parents still believe in spanking as a way of disciplining their wards. One of the reasons why spanking is not seen as an effective way of disciplining your child is because it will only bring dread and fear into your child’s mind especially those kinds of parents who beat their children blue black. Besides, there are other ways to discipline your child without really beating them.

Here’s how you can avoid punishing children;
1. Punishment makes a child feel unloved

By spanking your kids, they’ll feel worthless and insecure. Some parents don’t even see spanking their kids in public as a big deal, they’ll shout and hit kids in full public eye making the child feel ashamed and humiliated. Avoid spanking or punishing your child in full public view or their friends
2. Correct their mistakes

Beating your kid is not the best way to tell them what they did wrong and why it’s wrong. Instead, sit them down and gently tell them “beating your sister is wrong because… Don’t ever do that again” This way they know what they did wrong and why it’s wrong, they’ll also lear that people make mistakes but it mustn’t be repeated. Looking back now, I realised I never knew why I was beaten by my mom, I just know I did wrong and had to be punished, but I wasn’t told why what I did is considered wrong. 
3. Avoid extreme punishments

Giving your child light punishment from time to time is okay as long as it’s not extreme and you don’t do it often. On those rare occasions you punish your child, she’d know that she really went to the extreme which is why she had to be punished. But locking them up in their room, starving them, or beating them blue black is too extreme.
4. Don’t get violent

When your child offend you, don’t punish them immediately. When you angrily hit your child, you may hurt them in the process cursing your child to be injured, then you’d start feeling guilty.
Encourage good behaviour

When your child does something impressive, encourage and reward them, this will communicate to them that being of good behaviour is the best. That way, they’d want to do the right thing, knowing doing bad will do them no good.
6. Watch what your child 

Keep an eye on what your children watch, children can learn different things from social media,  videos and movies. If your child has an iPhone or iPad, put parental control on it to monitor what they watch.
7. Model good behaviour

Keep your child away from environments that’ll influence them badly, also at home, realise your children will imitate whatever you do, so be careful what you do around them.
8. Never compare your children

Never compare your child to another or their friends, this usually make children revolt and want to act rashly and be the exact opposite of the person they are being compared to.

And finally, whatever your child is good at, nurture it! Don’t get worked up because your child doesn’t meet your expectation or about what they are unable to do, focus on their strength while gently helping them work on their weaknesses. Let them realise their strength too, so they are not of the opinion that they aren’t good with anything.

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How To Build Your Kid’s Character

Parents have a lot to do in their children’s life. A child can decide which course to take no matter the way his parents showed him, but if you did your part as a parent you wouldn’t have any fears knowing you did well by your kids and you’d be able to vouch for your child any time. Every parent should endeavour to build children with enviable characters, here are some tips to help you.

Here are the characters all parents should build in their children;


1. Honesty

There are many who have gone a long way just by being honest. Teach your child the importance of honesty, when they own up to doing wrong, reward them and when they lie, discipline them. Even a simple act of stealing sweets shouldn’t be ignored, although discipline should be light and the child should be told what they did wrong.


2. Hard work

I never heard of any man whom hard work killed, my mum has a saying “hard work doesn’t kill, only laziness does” Even if you’re rich, if you don’t teach your child to be hardworking, they’ll wreck the family company they are handling in just a month because hard work is not their thing.  Talk to your child about how you work hard to give him all he needs in life and why he has to do the same, starting now.

3. Positivity

This starts with you, when you wake up in the morning, be positive, “This is such a beautiful day, full of hope and promises” say this when your child is within earshot. You need to teach your child to see a good side to everything, not that there’s no bad in the world but even in darkness, teach them to see light.

4. Strength

Teach your children to be strong, especially if you have a girl child. Women are making it in the world today that’s because they never allowed themselves to be trampled in the oceans of men who are ready to push them aside and see them as nothing. Women are being widely accepted in our world today, if only such a woman will distinct herself. Teach your daughter to be strong and never back down.

You can’t have a perfect child unless he’s a robot, because humans are made to be imperfect but when you gently but firmly mould a child’s character from a young age he won’t turn around? And the credit goes to you because you will feel accomplished as a parent to such a child and you’re helping society be a better place.

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